Always remember that whomever you are reacting with, be it friend or foe, love one, wife, child or parents, that they are all seeking exactly the same thing that you are seeking, peace and happiness. It is so very easy to get upset at other people when they do things that we judge are the improper thing to do for the situation. We all do this judging, and we all in our hearts know it is wrong to judge other people, because there is no right or wrong , there’s only what we deem as being right or wrong. A good example would be if you were raised in a good Baptist home in the southern United States drinking alcohol would be wrong, but if you were raised in Italy drinking wine would be as normal as drinking water. There are hundreds of like situations when comparing what is good and what is bad, the only correct policy would be not to judge because you are not qualified to judge.
Why are we the individual person that we have become? Why are we all so varied in our personalities? Everyone thinks that the way they see things is the correct way and everyone should see things as they see them. When you begin to study the makeup of people you begin to understand why people think about things as they do.
Every human being is different from every other human being. We are products of our environment and all of environments have been totally different. When a child is conceived is when their personality begins to be formed. The things that the mother does, says, and thinks all affect the child while it are in the womb. Her moods affect the child. The food she eats and all the things that she takes into her body has an effect on the child. Even people she comes in contact with while the child is in the womb affects it. Every child is completely unique before it is born into the world. After birth so many things can and will effect the entire lifetime of the child. The way the doctor handles the baby (the baby in my opinion should never be spanked), the attitude of the nurses, visitors and endless instruments of influence. As the child grows it is influenced by everyone and everything it comes in contact with, parents, teachers, classmates, preachers and siblings. Some of the influence is good some are bad. There is no way to control what type of influence the child receives.
Can an adult person control their behavior? Our behavior as an adult is controlled by our influences that we have been inundated with since birth. It is extremely difficult to control the behavior that those influences have created within us. There are thief's, murderers, child molesters, wife beaters, and hundreds of other crimes that people commit, and all of these behaviors are a results of bad treatment or bad behavior given to the person when they were a child.
Back to being judgmental. How should we react when we have contact with bad behavior, be it serious crimes or things such as bad tempers, rudeness, hurtfulness and all the other thing people do?
Everyone on the earth wants peace and happiness. Everyone.
When you are reacting with someone, remember the person you see is not the person they are, underneath all the rough exterior they are seeking peace and happiness but they have also been influenced by something they have little control over, and that is the good or bad influence and treatment they have received from other people during their lifetime.